Clients.....part deux

Ok, so there are clients and there are clients!  With kids, it is either the delinquents in detention who desperately want you to get them out and are willing to lie or do anything to get out.  That may or may not be a good idea since when they are out...they tend to do "stupid" or criminal things that get them right back in detention.  Other kids have horrible things happen to them and although they are "damaged", they still can have child-like glee about deciding whether or not their new name (on their adoption birth certificate) should be "Godzilla" or not (true story).

Adults who have had their kids taken away fall into two categories generally.  The "I'm pissed off at CPS but I'll do anything to get my kids back" and the "I'm pissed at CPS and they can't tell me what to do, they're my effing kids".  The second ones are the kind that generally won't stop smoking dope or wanting to beat their kids when they do something wrong (and telling their CPS therapist that).  Getting pregnant by the same jerk who beat them up before is generally "frowned upon in this establishment" and yet, they ask with child-like confusion, "could this hurt my case?".  I so badly want to say, "Gee, you think?" but then that would be the problem...they don't think.

So, usually they don't get this button....

Can't live with 'em, can't shoot 'em....

My Favorite Client?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

  Oh, for the days when I represented the "State of Arizona" as a criminal prosecutor.....I didn't have needy clients who called to "chat" with me and repeated the same things over and over...and over.  I didn't have clients who thought that I had all the answers (yeah, don't know HOW they ever thought that!).  I didn't have clients who called to leave lengthy messages on the weekend and then got upset when I didn't call them first thing in the morning.  I didn't have clients who disappear on me and then leave me answering to the judge, "no, Your Honor, he/she didn't tell me that they were leaving the state / country (fill in the blank)"...even if they did tell me, I couldn't tell the judge anyway but judges don't like to be reminded that there is such a thing as attorney / client relationship and that I have to refuse to answer if it would violate that right.  They think that the "black dress" entitles them to answers.  I didn't have clients who didn't do anything that CPS told them to do and are honestly surprised that they aren't getting their kids back.  Bleh!

However, as I remember, I did have victims that called me all the time and thought that I could and would send the S.O.B. to prison for life (when I had already explained that life in prison wasn't an option for a simple burglary and neither was the death penalty).  I did have cops who called to gripe that I hadn't issued their case (when it was a crappy case that a defense attorney could win blindfolded).  I did have witnesses disappear on me and leave me to explain to the judge why the "almighty State" couldn't find them...

S.O.S., different address...sigh